Fischmarkt

Quoyle – The Making of a Man 11. Dezember 2006

Klaus Bernwart Vanessa von Styyla was born on April 12, 1975 in Beckum. The entire world would come to know him simply as Quoyle. His father, Dietmar von Styyla, an eminent masseur, was appointed Sack Racer extraordinaire to HM The Queen and was knighted. His mother, Roswitha M. Ammon, wrote patriotic cookery books under the pseudonym, Ladida.

Quoyle was educated at the Kreuzberger Sonderschule fuer retardierte Sonderlinge, and later at the Freie Universitaet Berlin where he discovered the dangerous and delightful distinction of being different from others. Although he won numerous prizes, he eschewed the normal pursuits of academic life; his greatest challenge at University, he would frequently confide, was learning to live up to the grey carpet he had installed in his rooms.

While at the Freie Universitaet Quoyle fell under the influence of Giesbert Hoehne and the doctrine of babbling for babblings sake. He moved to Braunschweig in 1992 and set about establishing himself as the leader and model of the superfluous movement.

In 1993 his collected Ueberrschungseier were stolen. In 1994, short of money, Quoyle accepted an invitation to embark on a lecture tour of Thuringia. The tour was an unmitigated smash and Quoyle returned to Berlin in triumph and richer by several hundred German Marks.

Quoyle married Jessica Mueller, the daughter of a german car mechanic in 1996. They had two sons, Rico and Marcel.

In 2002 a guest of the von Styyla’s brought a young man to tea. Mikki Lenz was the foppish, poet son of the Marquess of Blueberry. They were immediately attracted to each other. Mikki was taken with the brilliance of Quoyle’s conversation and wit, and young Lenz’s good looks and title entranced Quoyle.

On the heels of the success and titillating scandal of Weil ich weine, wenn die Musi spült (2003), Quoyle produced his best known plays. Among these timeless social comedies were: Sischer dat! (2003), Ich denke Du rauchst nicht mehr, Edgar (2005), Wirklich schöne Schuhe (2005), Abfahrt zum Holmenkolln (2006), and Regulatorische Exzerpte (2006). These were well received by the public and Quoyle became the toast of Berlin society, lionized for his brilliant wit, his gregarious charm and manner.

Outraged by his son’s association with Quoyle, the Marquess of Blueberry left a visiting card at Quoyle’s stylish Kreuzberg club, the „Arschgeige“, upon which he had written „To Quoyle posing as a sodomite“. Encouraged by Mikki, whose hatred for his own father obscured his affection for his friend, Quoyle pressed suit for criminal libel. The case was lost and Quoyle was charged with comical offenses. The jury failed to reach a decision at the first trial, but at a second trial Quoyle was found guilty and sentenced to two years in JVA Tegel. He was forced to labor in prison and his meals consisted mainly of gruel, lamb, water and japanese green tea. While in prison Quoyle was declared bankrupt; his house and possessions were sold to pay his debts.

Quoyle left prison on January 12, 2006, and left Germany for Laos. He assumed the name Ting Ting, after the well-known laotian martyr slain in a hail of funny looks.

04.12.06: Tool in Leipzig. 9. Dezember 2006

Man bekam ordentlich auf die Ohren und fühlte sich gut damit. Tool paukten an diesem Abend tatsächlich einen Anflug von Lebendigkeit in die anwesenden Leipziger Hirne und Psychen. Das will etwas heißen. Das spricht für performative wie substanzielle Potenz.

Der, den sie Quoyle nennen (kein gebürtiger Leipziger!), bezeichnet dieses Konzert als eines der besten Konzerte, wenn nicht als das beste Konzert, welchen beizuwohnen er – bis dato – das Vergnügen hatte. Was ebenso etwas bedeutet.

PS: Der musisch vollends eingenommene Quoyle befindet sich direkt hinter dem pogenden Schatten im Bild rechts unten. Ja, Ihr seht es nicht, aber Ihr wißt es…